Needs and Wants: Definition, Difference, & Examples

By Kelsey Schultz, Ph.D. Candidate
​Reviewed by Tchiki Davis, M.A., Ph.D.

Keep reading to learn more about your wants, your needs, and how to know the difference.

*This page may include affiliate links; that means we earn from qualifying purchases of products.

If you’ve ever struggled to distinguish between wants and needs you are not alone. Sometimes we want something so intensely it feels like a need. Similarly, we may actually need something that we have dismissed as a want. For example, we may think that taking some time off work is a frivolous want and not something we should dedicate too much of our headspace to. In reality, we may be barreling towards burnout if we don’t give ourselves a break. 

It isn’t always easy to tell the difference between a need and a want or to identify the value in satisfying our needs and wants. However, understanding our needs and wants better can help us to improve our health and well-being.  

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What Are Needs and Wants?

Wants and needs can both be generally understood as psychological factors that drive human behavior. For example, a need for shelter would have us to seek housing just as wanting a nice meal might motivate us to find a good restaurant. Understanding the definition of, and distinction between, needs and wants is crucial for leading a balanced and fulfilling life. 

According to Abraham Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, needs are divided into five categories: physiological, safety, love and belonging, esteem, and self-actualization. These needs are arranged in a hierarchy, with physiological and safety needs being the most basic, and self-actualization being the most advanced (Maslow, 1943). We’ll discuss each of these needs in more depth later on. These categories of human needs as defined by Maslow include both physical needs and psychological needs and are based on the idea that needs include both survival and well-being.

Wants, on the other hand, are typically defined as desires for things that go beyond the basic necessities. These can range from luxuries like designer clothes and fancy cars, to more simple pleasures like a good book or a relaxing bath. 

As per Maslow's theory, the most basic needs must be met before moving on to higher levels of needs. It is essential to understand and fulfill these basic needs in order to move on to fulfilling our wants and achieving self-actualization.

​Self-awareness for needs & wants
When it comes to needs, it’s important to have self-awareness. Though some scholars describe human needs as neatly existing in one of five categories, what our personal, current needs are is not always readily apparent. To truly understand what our needs are and determine whether or not those needs are being met, it's essential to reflect on our own daily experiences. For example, through reflection, we may realize that our need for belonging isn’t being met and decide to fulfill that need by picking up a new hobby or joining a club. Though wants are not critical for our survival and well-being, they can still add value to our lives. 
​
​I’m reminded of a quote from C.S. Lewis about seemingly superfluous endeavors including philosophy and art. He says, “It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things which gives value to survival.” It certainly is important to distinguish between wants and needs so that we can be sure our needs are met before we spend resources on our wants, but it’s okay to satisfy our wants from time to time.

The Difference Between Needs and Wants

The primary difference between needs and wants is that needs are considered to be essential to our survival and well-being while wants are thought to be superfluous. Though this distinction may sound simple, distinguishing between wants and needs is not quite as simple as it sounds. In fact, there is a large community of scholars who have been trying to clearly define the difference for decades (McGregor et al., 2009). 

Some suggest that one way to distinguish a need from a want is to consider whether or not it’s absence would cause harm (McGregor et al., 2009). For example, if I took away your home it would cause you harm, but if I took away some of the art you have in your home, it wouldn’t. It might make you sad or angry with me because theft isn’t cool, but you could move on with your life just fine.

Other scholars, such as Doyal & Gough (1984), argue that needs are objective, universal, and central to human welfare or suffering. Anything that doesn’t meet this definition would then be considered a want. 
​
The difference between basic needs - such as food, water, and shelter - and wants is pretty obvious. But when you start to have needs beyond the basics, like a comfortable mattress, a laptop, or a car, the distinction starts to get a bit murky.

Examples of Needs and Wants

There are many different types of needs and wants that people may have. Understanding the difference between these two concepts can help to make better decisions and improve quality of life. Needs are commonly separated into two categories: physical needs and psychological needs. Wants are commonly material goods, but can also fall into the physical and psychological categories.

Physical Needs ​
Physical needs are those things that are necessary for survival, such as food, water, clothing, and shelter. These are essential for the body to function and sustain life. 

Psychological Needs
Psychological needs, on the other hand, are more subjective, and they are related to our emotional and psychological health. According to Deci & Ryan (2000), some examples of basic psychological needs include autonomy, competence, and relatedness. Said more plainly, we need to feel free to make our own choices, like we are capable of willfully affecting the world around us, and to feel connected to others.  

Wants Examples
Below are a few examples of wants that are obviously distinct from needs. However, some wants, such as those described earlier, are not easily distinguishable from needs. 

• The latest iPhone
• Tattoos
• A spa day
• An extravagant trip to Europe
• Monogrammed hand towels
• Art
• A facial
• Brunch

Overall, understanding the difference between needs and wants can help us to make better decisions and prioritize our spending. Needs should take precedence over wants as they are essential for survival. Once basic needs are met, then we can focus on our wants and determine how to prioritize them in order to maximize our enjoyment and quality of life.

Needs and Wants List

According to Abraham Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs (1943), there are five types of needs:
​

• Physiological needs: These include the basic needs for survival such as food, water, and shelter.
• Safety needs: This includes the need for security and protection from harm, both physically and emotionally.
• Love and belonging needs: This includes the need for love, affection, and connection with others.
• Esteem needs: This includes the need for self-esteem, confidence, and respect from others.
• Self-actualization needs: This includes the need for personal growth, self-fulfillment, and the realization of one's full potential. 

As for wants, they can be classified as:

• Material wants: These are desires for physical objects such as designer clothes, luxury cars, and other material possessions.
• Experiential wants: These are desires for experiences such as traveling, dining out, and other activities.
• Emotional wants: These are desires for emotional experiences such as love, happiness, and fulfillment.
• Intellectual wants: These are desires for knowledge, education, and intellectual stimulation.
• Spiritual wants: These are desires for spiritual growth, connection with a higher power, and a sense of meaning and purpose in life.

​It's worth noting that wants can be categorized in many different ways, the above classification is one of the possible ways to categorize them based on Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs theory.

Needs and Wants for Kids

Understanding the needs and wants of children is crucial for their development and well-being. According to the theory of Bronfenbrenner's ecological systems (Brofenbrenner, 1992), children's development is influenced by various systems that interact with each other, including the microsystem, mesosystem, exosystem, and macrosystem.
​
In the microsystem, children's immediate environment such as their family, school, and peers, play a crucial role in their development. They need a safe and nurturing environment where their basic needs such as food, shelter, and safety are met. They also need to feel a sense of belonging and connection with their family and peers.

The mesosystem, which is the interaction between different systems, also plays a crucial role in children's development. For example, the relationship between a child's family and school can have a significant impact on their academic and social development.

The exosystem, which includes the larger systems that influence the microsystem, such as community and culture, also plays a role in children's development. Children need to be exposed to different cultures and experiences, and to learn about different perspectives, in order to develop a sense of empathy and understanding for others.

The macrosystem, which is the cultural and societal context, also plays a role in children's development. Children need to be exposed to different cultures and experiences, and to learn about different perspectives, in order to develop a sense of empathy and understanding for others.

In conclusion, it is critical for children's growth and well-being to understand their needs and desires. According to Bronfenbrenner's ecological systems theory, the microsystem, mesosystem, exosystem, and macrosystem are only a few of the interconnected systems that have an impact on children's development. It's important to keep in mind that children's needs and wants can change as they develop, so it's crucial to adapt and make changes to satisfy those demands.

For more on Needs and Wants for Kids, check out this video:

Video: Needs and Wants Explained - Facts for Kids

Needs and Wants for Students

Knowing the necessities and wishes of students is crucial for their academic performance and general well-being. Based on Zimmerman's Self-Regulation Theory (Zimmerman, 2000), students require self-regulation to excel in their learning process.
​
One of the main needs for students is to have a sense of autonomy and self-direction in their learning. They need to be given the opportunity to set goals, make plans, and monitor their own progress. This helps them to take ownership of their learning and develop a sense of self-efficacy.

Another important need is to have a sense of competence and mastery in their learning. Students need to be provided with challenging and engaging learning experiences, and to be given opportunities to reflect on their own progress and achievements. This helps them to develop a sense of self-worth and self-esteem.

Wants for students can include a desire for recognition and appreciation for their efforts, a desire for fun and enjoyable learning experiences, and a desire for social interactions and connection with their peers.

In order to support the needs and wants of students, educators should create a supportive and challenging learning environment that promotes self-regulation. This can include providing opportunities for self-reflection, setting clear goals and expectations, and providing regular feedback on progress. Additionally, educators should work to create a positive classroom culture that values and recognizes student efforts, and provide opportunities for student-led activities and project-based learning.

Needs and Wants for Adults

It is imperative, as a society, to comprehend the needs and wants of adults. The Self-Determination Theory, put forth by Ryan and Deci (2017), posits that there are three innate psychological needs that drive adult behavior: autonomy, relatedness, and competence. As we continue to navigate the complexities of human behavior, it is essential that we take into account these fundamental needs.
​
One of the main needs for adults is autonomy, which is the need to have control over one's own life and to make their own choices. Adults need to feel that they are in control of their lives, and that they are making choices that align with their values and beliefs.

Another important need is relatedness, which is the need to have social connections and relationships with others. Adults need to feel that they are connected to others, and that they have a sense of belonging. This includes having close relationships with family and friends, as well as being part of a community or group.

The third need is competence, which is the need to feel capable and effective in one's life. Adults need to feel that they have the skills and abilities to achieve their goals and that they are making progress in their lives.

Wants for adults can include a desire for material possessions, experiences, and emotional experiences. They may also have a desire for personal growth and self-actualization.

Needs and Wants in a Relationship

A relationship is a complex system that involves the interplay of various needs and wants between two individuals. In order to understand these needs and wants, it is important to consider the different ecological systems that shape our behavior and interactions within a relationship. One such framework is the Social Exchange Theory (Emerson, 1987), which suggests that individuals engage in relationships based on the perceived rewards and costs of interacting with a specific partner.

According to Social Exchange Theory, individuals have both emotional and instrumental needs in a relationship. Emotional needs include feeling loved, valued, and supported. Instrumental needs refer to the practical benefits that come from being in a relationship, such as companionship and shared resources. Individuals will seek out partners who can fulfill their emotional and instrumental needs and will stay in the relationship as long as the rewards outweigh the costs.

​Want & need conflicts
In a relationship, there may be instances where one partner's wants conflict with the other's needs. For example, one partner may want to spend more time with friends, while the other needs quality time together to feel secure in the relationship.

Another important concept to consider in understanding needs and wants in a relationship is self-determination theory (Ryan & Deci, 2017). As described above, self-determination theory suggests that individuals have innate psychological needs for autonomy, competence, and relatedness. When these needs are met, individuals feel a sense of well-being and satisfaction in their relationships. When they are not met, individuals may feel frustrated and unfulfilled.

Understanding the needs and wants in a relationship is crucial for building a strong and healthy relationship. Social exchange theory and self-determination theory provide valuable frameworks for understanding the dynamics of relationships and how individuals can work together to meet each other's needs and wants. It is important to remember that needs are necessities for survival and well-being, while wants are desires or preferences. Both need to be taken into consideration when building a successful relationship.
​
For more on Needs and Wants in a Relationship, check out this video about how to ask for them:

Video: Codependence Recovery | How to Ask For Your Needs and Wants ​

Needs and Wants Activities

1. Prioritization exercise: Create a list of all your current needs and wants, then prioritize them by level of importance or urgency. This can help you focus on what is truly important to you and make sure that your time and resources are being directed towards fulfilling your most pressing needs and wants.
2. Needs and wants journaling: Keep a journal where you can reflect on your needs and wants on a daily or weekly basis. Write down any new needs and wants that come to mind, and also reflect on how your current needs and wants are being met or not met.
3. Communication practice: Practice communicating your needs and wants to others in a clear, direct, and non-threatening way. This can help you to be more effective in expressing yourself and getting your needs and wants met in different areas of your life.
4. Boundaries setting: Set clear boundaries around what you are willing and not willing to do in order to meet your needs and wants. This can help you to avoid feeling taken advantage of or resentful towards others.
5. Goal setting: Set specific, measurable, and achievable goals that align with your needs and wants. This can help you to work towards fulfilling them in a realistic and sustainable way.
6. Self-care: Prioritize self-care activities that help you to meet your basic needs such as sleep, nutrition, and exercise. This can help you to be more resilient in dealing with stress and challenges that may arise in fulfilling your needs and wants.
7. Network building: Build a support network of people who can help you to meet your needs and wants. This can include friends, family, and professionals who can provide you with emotional support, practical assistance, or other resources.
8. Reflective thinking: Reflect on your past experiences and how you have dealt with your needs and wants. This can help you to identify patterns, strengths and weaknesses and find ways to improve your current situation.

Needs and Wants Quotes

• "The greatest challenge in life is discovering who you are. The second greatest is being happy with what you find." - Unknown
  
• "The only way to do great work is to love what you do." - Steve Jobs
  
• "The things you own end up owning you." - Chuck Palahniuk
  
• "The greatest wealth is to live content with little." - Plato
  
• "The greatest wealth is to live content with just enough." - Unknown
  
• "The greatest happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved; loved for ourselves, or rather, loved in spite of ourselves." - Victor Hugo
  
• "Be content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you." - Lao Tzu
  
• "You have needs and wants and desires, and you deserve to have them met." - Unknown
  
• "We all have needs and wants, but the secret is to not let them consume us." - Unknown
  
• "The things you desire are also the things that will destroy you." - J.R.R. Tolkien
  

Articles Related to Needs and Wants

​Want to learn more? Check out these articles:

• What Do I Want?! 9 Tips to Figure Out What You Really Want
• ​Wish Lists: Ideas, Examples, & Quotes
  
• Assertive Communication: Definition, Examples, & More​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

Books Related to Needs and Wants​

If you’d like to keep learning more, here are a few books that you might be interested in.

• Lily Learns about Wants and Needs (Money Basics) For Kids​
  
• A Submissive's Guide to Your Wants and Needs
  
• The Overspent American: Why We Want What We Don't Need
  
• His Needs, Her Needs: Building a Marriage That Lasts
  

Final Thoughts on Needs and Wants

When it comes to our needs and wants, it is essential to take the time to reflect on what truly matters to us and what we need to feel fulfilled and satisfied in our lives. Whether it be in our relationships, career, personal development, leisure, or family, our needs and wants are unique to each of us and understanding them is the first step to fulfilling them.

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References

• Bronfenbrenner, U. (1992). Ecological systems theory. Jessica Kingsley Publishers.
• Deci, E. L., & Ryan, R. M. (2000). The" what" and" why" of goal pursuits: Human needs and the self-determination of behavior. Psychological inquiry, 11(4), 227-268.
• Doyal, L., & Gough, I. (1984). A theory of human needs. Critical Social Policy, 4(10), 6-38.
• Emerson, R. M. (1987). Social exchange theory.
• Maslow, A. H. (1943). A theory of human motivation. Psychological review, 50(4), 370.
• McGregor, J. A., Camfield, L., & Woodcock, A. (2009). Needs, wants and goals: Wellbeing, quality of life and public policy. Applied research in Quality of Life, 4, 135-154.
• Ryan, R. M., & Deci, E. L. (2017). Self-determination theory. Basic psychological needs in motivation, development, and wellness.
• Zimmerman, B. J. (2000). Attaining self-regulation: A social cognitive perspective. In Handbook of self-regulation (pp. 13-39). Academic press.

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