The Number 1 Reason Why You Are Still Not Happy
If you don’t have a good reason for continuing to do a happiness practice, you’ll likely abandon it before it does you much good. That's why it's so important to find happiness practices you enjoy.
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Are you wondering why you're still not happy? Maybe you already “think positive” or “engage in mindfulness”. Well, even if you practice these skills, you can still be unhappy if you don’t actually enjoy practicing these skills. If you don’t have a good reason for continuing to practice these skills, you’ll abandon it before it does you much good.
Think of it this way. Let’s say you want to be a musician, but you really hate playing the violin. I keep telling you that the only way that you can be a musician is by playing the violin. So you listen to me, because I’m the expert. You learn to play, but your bored and unsatisfied. You’re not motivated to play because you hate the violin and you eventually give up, because, well… just ugh.
This makes perfect sense, right? Why would you continue doing something you hate? The same goes for happiness.
But what if I told you that there are a bunch of ways that you boost your happiness and you can choose to do what you enjoy? Wouldn’t you feel more empowered and motivated to keep at it? I think the answer to this question is obvious.
The exercise industry, which is a bit ahead of the happiness industry, knows the answer to this question. They’ll often tell you to do exercises that you enjoy. Sure, doing weight training might be better for your health than Zumba, but ultimately, doing anything is better than doing nothing. So do Zumba if you love it.
If you want to stick with something long enough for it to change your life, then you’re better off doing something you enjoy. Here in lies another problem with most happiness products. They rarely tell you that you have a choice in how you go about increasing your happiness. Inevitably, you will enjoy building some happiness skills and hate building others. I know I do.
In our happiness program, you learn a bunch of different happiness skills. You learn a little bit about all of them. Then you can choose to do the ones you most enjoy and benefit from. If you find happiness practices that you really enjoy, you’ll feel more empowered, motivated, and you’ll make rock-star progress.
About Dr. Tchiki Davis
Dr. Davis is founder of The Berkeley Well-Being Institute. After getting her PhD in psychology at Berkeley, she started creating online content & programs to boost well-being—some of these have reached more than a million people. As author of Outsmart Your Smartphone, and contributor to Psychology Today, The Greater Good Science Center, and Shine Text, Dr. Davis aims to share her insights on happiness & health with people all across the world. Learn more about Dr. Davis.